jasmine soup - ingredients subject to change

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

what a wastrel am i...

I'm really worried that I'm going to get out of this school and get a degree and still not know anything! I feel so stupid sometimes. Its making the grad school application process more intimidating. Knowing that if any of these schools are snowed by my transcript and accept me, they're going to be disappointed once I get there.

I've started filling out the online applications. I stop once I reach unanswerable questions. I almost wish I had never gone to Berkeley just because of the transcript confusion. They demand that you include every school you've ever attended but their form options are very limited. I'm always trying to squeeze in explanations like:

Degree Acquired: Junior Year Abr

Because their fields are remarkably short for the amount of information they want. I didn't even have enough space to write Biostatistics in a field for major.

OMG this is the most boring post ever. This is the most boring part of my life and I'm subjecting the rest of you to it.

Mostly I'm doing all of this in avoidence of actual work. I wish I were the kind of person who could read and appreciate text books. They are so dry it KILLS me. I re-read the same paragraph over and over and over. Thats what I really should be doing right now. Except I don't carry around my textbooks. So instead of reading them, I just get to spend that time feeling guilty for not reading them and subsequently stupid. (I know, I know, the solution is obvious)

I got 5 books in the mail yesterday. I've gotten really into travel memoirs lately. The one i'm reading now is about a family who went around the world one summer because of the parent's worry that corporate advertising world of america was turning their kids brains to mush. There is a lot of writing about dealing with the teenage daughter. Even though she's a teenager almost 10 years later than I was and in NYC, its remarkable how similar our thoughts and behavior were. Dressing up goth and dancing to Robert smith....she was sneaking into clubs, I was going to lambda (gay) dances at the holiday inn. They need to come up a with a cure for being a teenager.....its an awful time for everybody involved. Hormone shots or something.

Its officially fall here....It seems like it happened overnight. I had to pick all my squash and zucchinis. My yellow squash didn't get very big but the zucchini is ridiculous. Each one probably weighs about 2lbs. I'm trying to think of ways to hide the zucchini in food so jared will eat it. It has to be chopped up so small that he can't pick it out. I'm thinking zucchini bread.

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